Been awhile

So, I've been having some issues (I won't go into detail here) but after some refusal to do so I called my family doctor and made an appointment to talk. This appointment was this past Friday and for the few days leading up to Friday, I put myself through so much unnecessary stress. Anyway, I drew some cards the morning of the visit to get an idea about what to expect. I used the Vanessa tarot.

Page of Wands - when I saw this card I chuckled to myself. The girl is on her stick horse facing the past waving - immediately this told me to get on with it and just go. Talk to the doctor about the past issues leading up to today and go from there.

2 Wands - shows a lady chemist in her lab trying to figure out what to do or how to concoct what she needs. She is facing the future (so perhaps an answer will arrive). She is me not knowing exactly what would help me but together with the doctor we will try to figure it out.

Moon - definitely shows my mood and my nervousness and stress. Also tells me to talk about my emotions, fears and anxieties honestly.

As I look at the cards as a whole I felt the visit would be a good one and I'd get through it okay.

Indeed it was a rough few days (all brought on by me) as I stewed inside. I don't like to talk about myself, I don't like to reveal my weaknesses. But I got on that horse, got myself there and talked honestly and openly to the doctor. I felt vulnerable and somewhat fearful but talking came easy. She was a big help and made me feel comfortable.

In the end, I got some help and I am doing better. I had left the bottom card of the deck unturned and now had a look ... High Priestess. Quite appropriate really. I shared some secrets, I listened to my inner voice and I gained some insight into the mystery that is myself.

Good reading.

To be continued .....

Where have I been?

It has been so long. But not forgotten! Busy times with life in general both at work and here at home. Nothing terribly exciting but rather the busyness of general day to day activities adding in a few hurdles. Mercury retro was not easy this time around. Many computer related frustrations and some friendship areas of concern. I had to give my head a shake once in awhile and remember it will pass!!

Recently a friendship issue (an over 40 year friend) reared its ugly head rather than steaming below the surface as it previously was, so before handling it, I decided to draw a card from the Morgan Greer deck. The Devil appeared. Immediately I felt I needed to be careful how I handled things and what I said. (It was going to be a reply to an email) Not be manipulated or be manipulating. Take responsibility for my part in how things got to where they are now. I have suggested a one-on-one get together to renew our friendship, to talk. Will see how things turn out.

I am in the process of reorganizing my home office workspace. Designed to give me more space to spread out. In more ways than one ... better access to my books, decks and other papers and more room to do bigger spreads. It's been fun planning and getting everything ready. Hopefully within a week all will be complete.

Despite all of life's challenges (and indeed there are many), life really is joyous. I caught a glimpse of the full moon early Thursday morning. My windows face north so I don't always get to see it unless I go outside. Woke up and saw the bright light coming in the window and there she was setting in the west. I stood there in the dark for what seemed like the longest time and just stared. What a way to begin a day. No words to describe.

Once my office is finished, it is my plan to blog once a week to start off with. A weekly spread to go along with it.

To be continued ...

So I haven't been doing any tarot for a few weeks. I'm finding it hard to fit it in but am working on it. Doesn't feel right when I don't spend time with my cards. I did win a reading from Celeste (from her blog - Tarot by Celeste) and it was excellent. Celeste said some things I needed to hear and as a result think on. It played out more than I had hoped but all is good.

Work has been busy as we are still doing tax returns all the while settling in from the relocation. The new office is so much bigger and way more spread out and an overall nice place to work. I am still sad I can't walk to work anymore. I miss my walks. I did buy myself a bicycle last weekend and will be riding to work as often as I can. The best part is the route to work is a bike path 90% of the way there. No busy streets to ride on. Knowing this helped make the decision to buy it. It is a second hand bike, however, the lady only rode it twice so really its brand new. Love it!!

My work with the Motherpeace deck is at a standstill. The poor deck hasn't left its bag since last Tuesday. My plan is to begin again in the morning.

For right now, I got the deck out, meditated a bit with it, shuffled and drew one card to see what it had to say. 9 of Discs. That is me developing my strength and courage. Grounding myself and being in balance. All things I definitely need to work on right now considering everything going on. Mostly things happening to others having a substantial effect on me. I like this card. She is alone, as am I most of the time. She is surrounded with all the things she loves. I get a good feeling from this card. Makes me smile. It reminds me to make the effort to continue on my course. Make the time even when I think there isn't any.

It was a lovely day today. Went for a long bike ride this morning down by the river. Sat for a time with my friend, Brent, who passed away two years ago May 10. Or I should say I sat at the tree his sons planted in his name and listened to some music on my IPod. Brent was a musician and would have approved of my choices. A few tears fell but thats okay. I miss not being able to talk to him.

to be continued ....

I've spent some time with the Motherpeace deck looking at the picture and reading parts of the book. The cards are a little large for me to work with ... my hands are small and shuffling isn't easy.

I did my usual - a card for me, a card for the deck and a card for our relationship spread and got:
9 Wands
7 Cups
World

My initial reaction to 9 of Wands found me thinking this lady is tired and in need of a rest. She's worked hard but still sitting there. She doesn't give up no matter what. And I won't give up on this deck. The book says its a wise use of power, having experience = wisdom.

When I looked at the 7 of Cups my first thought was protection ... however, the book goes on about fantasy and dreams. The cups are choices and she must ground herself in some kind of reality. She can't have everything at once. If she focuses on the cup on her head it will spill out onto all the others. With the information from the book and looking again at the card, I do see it.

The World card as our relationship told me it would be complete. I will get something from this deck. It won't be easy but I have the experience and the knowledge to take the deck and allow my creativity to flow. Let the pictures speak to me. They certainly are very different and I am excited to learn more about them.

So, on Friday my son told me he was going back to school, to college, after dropping out three years ago. I am very happy with his decision. He is in a different place now and ready to finish what he started. It won't be easy working out all the financial stuff but he is determined.

I decided to draw three cards asking what I need to know about Jordan and school.

Son of Wands
8 Swords
World

There is the World again. That is a good sign. The Son of Wands is my child and indeed he is my child. Looking at the card it reminds me of a celebration amongst those who love each other. The sun is in the sky, everyone is happy. Exactly how Jordan is feeling and how I felt when he phoned to tell me the news.

8 of Swords confirms for me it won't be easy ... but much of his worries and even his fears about this is created by his mind ... creating obstacles to hold him back. He did that for a long time but is ready to get out of that box now. His perspective needs to change (and it is). Working out all the finances and getting part time hours with his current employer will at times make him feel like he's hitting a brick wall. I will remind him not to give up. One step at a time.

Overall these seem to be positive cards. I like them.

A bright sunny warmer day today ... enjoyable to listen to the birds singing as I write this.

To be continued ....

Happy Birthday

Happy birthday to myself. I will enjoy this day ... even if I have to work and even if it rains all day. I will find something to smile about. Work is crazy in a good sort of way because we are in the process of moving locations. My poor old body is sore. I've been so tired in the evenings this week, the Motherpeace deck has not been opened yet. Perhaps soon as I get home from work tonight, I can sit down for an hour or so and spend some time with it.

The last week has flown by with work being so busy as another tax season winds down and preparing to move locations this coming week. Talk about high stress levels. My tarot cards have been missing me!!

My daughter (who is 28) met someone recently but is a little hesitant (because of a long term relationship ending badly) to open herself up. She asked if I'd pull a few cards for her and requested the Pagan Tarot by Gina M Pace. The question being generally "what do I need to know". We didn't have time to do a large spread so I pulled three cards.

Ace of Wands
3 of Wands
7 of Swords

So fire/air ... compatible. That's good. The Ace shows the new beginnings of a relationship .. no doubt about that. Could indicate some insight to help her overcome her fear and take action. Seeing what she wants and going for it.

The 3 of Wands I love ... it shows the witch sitting at her desk in front of her computer with various papers around her, the newspaper classifieds open ... to me this indicates she is seeking something. Making an effort to make her goals a reality. In this case a relationship. 3's are often about love and blending.

7 of Swords in this deck talks about pleasant surprises ... realizing that sometimes good things just happen. Magick!! She needs to let go of her fears, stop assuming the worst and just let herself go with the flow. This card can indicate the excuses she is making to herself. She needs to decide what she wants and take action. Use her courage to overcome her challenges.

To me the cards indicated strongly for her to go for it. She agreed. And did just that. It is too soon to know what will come of it but the end result isn't what was questioned here. It was being able to let it begin. To open herself up again ... We will follow up in the future with another reading.

For next week, I have chosen the Motherpeace deck which I have had for years and never used. For some reason, I pass it by but the time has come. I am going to have a read through the book to get an understanding of the cards and go from there. I am excited.

To be continued ....

Okay ... so I drew three cards from the Hanson-Roberts deck ... a card for me, a card for the deck and a card for our relationship. Four of Swords, Three of Swords and Three of Cups (adding up to ten Wheel of Fortune. So much for my original intention. All I could see was my cousin and all the heartache surrounding his passing with the Three of Cups showing the gathering to celebrate his life. Also, a few hours ago I found out my (ex) mother-in-law is back in the hospital (not good news).

Not much else to say right now. I need a few days before I pick up the cards. My thoughts and energy are elsewhere.

Until then ...

The last few days have been very busy. Mostly with work as tax season gears down. I ended up working Saturday too so am feeling it today. Sad news on Thursday from my cousin that her brother was in the hospital and then on Friday that he'd passed away. So very sad as he is only 49 years old with two teenagers and a beautiful wife. RIP Bob. You'll be missed.

I am retiring the Sacred Circle deck. Doesn't seem to be the deck I need to use right now. It isn't speaking to me at all. I'll get back to it in the future. From my collection of 42 decks, 2 oracle decks , I tend to use maybe four all the time. It was my decision to work my way through the list as a way to get to know them and them know me. So its on to the next deck. I keep notes on each deck with the spreads I use and my thoughts. A good tool for learning and for looking back. There have been some wonderful surprises along the way (I am about a third the way through). Decks taking me by surprise and ones I didn't like but thought I would love.

Decision made ... going to use Hanson-Roberts deck. Cute cards, child like really and they are small which is nice for me since I have small little hands.

To be continued ...

Been thinking about the cards I drew yesterday without too much further insight. Seems I am drawing a blank with them. I did find out this morning by way of a cell phone message that my cousin is in the hospital. I don't know him all that well, however, I am very close to his sister. She is the one who phoned me. So I contacted his wife to let her know I was thinking of him and the family. Also my daughter is having some, hopefully, minor car troubles. She told me this morning as well. My son has decided to go back to college (yay) and applied the other day. He now has to make some follow up phone calls to complete his application and I talked to him earlier today as well. Lots of Mercury retro things going on for sure. Not so much these cards.

Anyway, will draw some new ones for tomorrow.

What a crazy busy day I had. I drew three cards this morning from the Sacred Circle deck but didn't look at them until now.
Knight of Cups, King of Discs and Page of Wands.

I am not sure I am liking these cards. As I look at them nothing speaks to me and I certainly can't relate them to my day. Plus they are all court courts and I still have trouble with the courts. Is there a man coming into my life?? Romance? Potential for a creative endeavor? None of those things are on my mind at all and truth is I don't have time until tax season and the work relocation is over to think about anything. So ... not sure what these cards are telling me at all.

Besides being busy at work, I went to the dentist for a cleaning this morning and had my hair cut after work. Not seeing these things in these cards. I will keep them on my desk and see what tomorrow brings. Perhaps something will shout out at me.

To be continued ....

I've spent some time with the Sacred Circle deck. Had a quick look at the companion book but set it aside for now. Things have been changed from the "norm" ... the order of the cards for one thing. I find the cards very beautiful which is what drew me to them originally. The minors are basically a landscape picture with the number of swords, wands, disc or cups for the number. They also have a keyword at the top. In this case, it will help to know a little something about what the numbers mean. These cards are large for my hands and not easily shuffled.

I drew three cards:
1 - A card for me - 5 Wands
2 - A card for the deck - Page of Swords
3 - A card for our relationship - 4 Swords

I am going to have to focus and pay attention. This deck is going to make me develop my own ideas and not rely on the book (funny that I set the book aside earlier). In order for this relationship to work, there will need to be some meditation involved. (especially so since the 5+4 add up to 9 which is the Shaman card). I get the feeling I am not to use these cards to read for others. At least not at this point. They have a lot to say to me if I am grounded enough to listen, contemplate and meditate.

We shall see what happens. Not sure I like them but, as always, I will use them for the week. This evening or perhaps first thing in the morning before I head off to work, I will do a general three card spread. Probably keep it for a couple of days before drawing another. I'll keep notes on my day's adventures and see if there is some insight into the meanings of these cards. The minors are going to be the most interesting and difficult.

Another cool day, however, the promise of sunshine and warmer temps for the coming week. Hope so. I work in a small accounting firm meaning it is now tax season with two more weeks to go (in Canada our taxes are due April 30). Right now my life is work, eat, sleep, work, eat sleep ..... not much energy left for the rest of my life. May 1 is a wonderful day!!!

To be continued ....

It is so hard to believe its been a year since I've updated. And to think it was supposed to be a daily or at least a weekly blog. Well it's a new day and a new blog.

A few days ago a good friend emailed me for tarot advice about something in her life she was ready to do after two plus years of skirting around the issue. Its been difficult for her going back and forth and up and down. Anyway, I drew three cards from the Spiral Deck ... Ten of Swords, Six of Wands and Four Wands. I immediately saw her struggles and how hard it would be not only on her but on the other person involved. But the other two cards made me smile. I felt she should go ahead with her plans. To me these cards showed the end of a cycle for her. Leaving behind a situation not in her best interests. It wouldn't be overnight but changes for the better are on the way. All her efforts will be rewarded. I contacted her and told her so. She promised to fill me in after the fact.

Spring has finally arrived. Brings forth a sense of hope inside me and I can't help but smile. Seeing the leaves begin to grow and flowers popping up reminds me of the beauty of nature and how its all so much bigger than me. I am a lover of walking and for the past four/five years have walked to and from work all year round. However, my place of work is relocating in May and I will no longer be able to walk. When I first heard this news I was very depressed. I love my walk to work and home again. It soothes my soul plus it was great exercise. What is one to do? After much thought, a few weeks ago I purchased a treadmill to use in the morning before work and again once I get home. So far its been working out really well and I am surprised to find I enjoy it and even found myself running. Of course I will still go for outdoor walks when I can and in the spring/summer/fall hopefully often as the days are longer. During the summer months, I like to plan walking trips to various parts of my town and explore.

My deck for next week is the Sacred Circle Tarot by Anna Franklin. I've had it for awhile but never used it and honestly, never really looked at it. Not sure if I like it or not but am going to give it a go. I always start a new deck off with a three card spread ... a card for me, a card for the deck and a card for our relationship. Will spend some time with the cards tomorrow, do the spread and blog about it.

To be continued.