Big (life changing) changes in progress (I hope)

Can't believe it is September 1st already.  Where did the summer go?  For me it has been full of searching within and without.  During this process, I made a pretty big decision and am in the midst of the follow through.  Details to be shared once it is a done deal.  My stress level and ability to concentrate is, well, off the charts.   Listen to my inner voice, not the one sitting on my shoulder, I keep reminding myself.  Over and over as I tend to second guess my decisions.  Basically that is just the fear (perhaps of change) talking.

Today, I drew three cards relating to this particular life change, what I need to know and the ultimate effect.  These are the cards I drew from the Anna K Tarot:

Wow, I think this just might work out???  Do I dare think so? Hopefully within the week I will be celebrating as in the Nine of Cups.  Any positive thoughts directed my way would be appreciated, especially Tuesday around 7pm.

'til next time ....

Encouragement

Using the Hezicos Tarot by Mary Griffin for today's draw.

I do believe I am being encouraged to have more hope and optimism in my heart, mind and body.  Give form to what is within and being confident about it.  Pay attention to the little clues as they could very well be the key to opening the door. (I am struggling to give form to much of anything lately.)

Any thoughts out there in the Universe?

Miss my blog.

Unconscious Awareness

Finally, a week off work.  A week to unwind, relax and spend time doing .. well whatever I feel like doing.  Contemplate, exercise, catch up.

With that said, it has been harder than I thought to take myself out of my normal work routines and get out the creative me.  Concentration is somewhat lacking.  Although I do suspect my old brain needs a rest.  Some meditation is in order so have been spending time doing that.

Still with the Vision Quest Tarot by Gayan S. Winter & Jo Dose using the same spread as the other day, my cards for today - Card 1 - The Essence of my "issues"; Card 2 - What hinders me; and Card 3 - What helps me.

Surprise, surprise.  Two cards the same as last time, different position but same message.

I had already made the decision to concentrate on various types of meditations a few days ago.  So seeing the Moon reinforces this is a good decision.  Very important to get deeper in touch with my inner life, even my past lives.  Bring to the surface what needs to be dealt with, what has been forgotten but is affecting me now.

Mother of Earth in the hindering me position is telling me to be kind and good to myself.  I need to be my own security/foundation.  Many years have been spent being this for others and yes, still can be, but to a lesser degree.  She is also telling me to stop obsessing about certain financial matters relating to my future security.  To have faith in the plan worked out, let life work itself out and be here in the now.

Four of Fire I think the time is right around the corner where all the emotional ups and downs and confusions of this past year will be worked through.  I have purged, both physically and emotionally, with the intent to welcome the new.  I am grateful to all those who have been a part of my life and to those who have helped without me even being aware. Never take anything for granted.  

I love this deck and what it has to say. Glad I dug it out.  

Holy Crap!!

Busy time at work is over, summer is here, so where is Carol?  Why the difficulty in getting started again.    It is no secret, apart from work being way too busy, there has been some family health issues and also I suffered a best friend loss.  (not such a best friend as it turns out).  The combination brought me down big time leaving me with a long way back up.  But the determination of my Taurus Sun and the optimism of my Sag Moon somehow keeps me trying.  My Gemini Mercury has me all over the place lately and unable to concentrate for very long.  Good excuse right.  NOT.

Anyway, July is almost here.  I have lots of vacation time over the next three months and this is going to be my time to figure out exactly what it is I want now that life has changed. No, it is me that has changed.  Changing.  Moving forward with a new me.  Maybe not so visible on the outside but certainly within.

I am keeping to my word of using decks that have been stuck away.  Today got out Vision Quest Tarot by Gayan Silvie Winter and Jo Dose.

Based on what I said above, I decided to do a three card spread.  The first card is the essence of my question; the second card is what hinders me; and the third card is what helps me. 

Here are my cards:

I started to cry when I saw these cards.  All that emotion staring back at me and oh so true.  But yet so very helpful.  Especially the words written in the LWB about Five of Water "The veils of ignorance are being lifted.  An illusion you have created and clung to now slowly dissolves, as it must.  Be brave, this is the beginning of an internal liberation." The lost friendship was/is an illusion and I did cling to it thinking it was what it wasn't/isn't.  Dissolve away. 

I love the Balance card.  So gorgeous.  Earlier today I found a wonderful hour long guided meditation on YouTube and the plan is to work with that tonight.  Exactly what I need.

I love these cards.

Risks and beginnings

My card of the day is shown as the picture of the day.  I love it. Perfect for my new adventures so long on hold. No more hesitation or excuses.  Much needed vacation arriving July 4 for 10 days.  YAY!!  ME time.  So excited.

More to come.

Too soon

I have so many decks stashed away, not being used and in some cases, never used.  Why do I have them, why did I buy them, or receive them??  As part of my journey forward, I will use each of these decks with no time limits placed to discover if they are to remain in my life.

Yesterday, I dug out Once Upon a Time deck by Lisa Hunt.  I love the artwork but never did use the deck.

Earlier today pulled:

Perfect card for my thought processes. It shows me I am on my way, moving forward but not quite there. Look at all my ghosts.  Certainly some good, some bad, some somewhere in between.  That is for me to sort out before I can see what is at the end of those steps.  All I know for sure is I am on my way to a greater perspective and I must trust the flow of life as it takes me.  Trust in the unknown.  And know I am not alone.  Let others help me on this journey.

Now that my job will be calm once again and my energy levels pick up, hopefully blogging will resume. I miss it so much and miss keeping up with everyone.  The whole job thing and working in accounting has run its course for me.  Time to move on.  This I am working on.

Last evening as I turned off my computer and looked out the window, this is what I saw:

Just a sliver but what a sight.  What a lovely way to end the day.  :))))

Rebirth

Been tough times lately.  Of course work is extremely busy and stressful but that is usual for this time of year.  I am finding myself needing to find better ways to cope with it as I am getting older.  But the busyness will be over on May 1 and life will seem easier.  Amidst all of this busyness, three unexpected happenings shook my world and the world of loved ones. 

First, I want to thank anyone/everyone who sent healing thoughts and energy to my brother who suffered a stroke.  Every single thought meant the world to me (and to him and his family).  I am happy to say he is now home.  Physically he is mobile but he can't speak and has trouble understanding things.  However, the doctors say this should be temporary (fingers crossed) and some therapy will speed things along.  

I feel lighter today.  Lighter than I have for a very long time.  I exercised and it felt great.  I then meditated only with the thought for peace and calm to find its way inside me.  

Then I took out the DruidCraft Tarot deck out, held it for awhile and pulled:

Oh my gosh, what a perfect card.  The butterfly (me) is getting ready to fly!!  There is hope.

Indeed I have chosen to emerge once again and find my joy.

Love seeing the hare.  The hare is the animal that, in meditation, guides me up the path to my guide (who I haven't visited in far too long).  I call my hare "Harry".  How nice to see him sitting there waiting to take me.  Well we usually play first and then head up.  

A smile ... :)

Transitions

Need some healing energy

I've been MIA around here due to very long hours at work leaving no time for much else.

However,  I am taking a few minutes to ask anyone who happens to read this to send some healing energy and thoughts to my brother who had a stroke this past Saturday and is in the hospital.    Luckily they got him there quickly and that is a good thing.  Right now we are waiting.  Physically he seems to be able to move, mentally he isn't so great.  Hopefully that is temporary.

Difficult times.

Where has all the time gone.  Here it is February already and I've been MIA around here far too long.  My excuse ... work.  Another tax season underway and my life becomes work, eat, sleep and do it all over again and again.  I miss reading everyone's blogs so much and during the day at work tell myself "I will tonight and I'll even do a blog".  But I don't. :(

My daughter's 32nd birthday (can you believe that!!) was this past Wednesday.  I told her there was a special surprise for her but we needed to make an "appointment".  So she came over late this morning.  She was so excited.

I've always loved astrology and later tarot.  Studied, enjoyed, even did work for folks.  But never consistently.  It is my goal, now that retirement is on the horizon, to do astrology and tarot and actually make some money doing it.  But first, I must be able to get the knowledge in my head out.  Practice and practice and practice.

My first practice victim, my daughter today.  I presented her with a thorough write-up of her astrology chart along with a solar return report.   While she was here I went over the significant points and little tidbits of information.  She can take home what I wrote, read it,

absorb it and then if another meeting is required, I am up for that.

After our discussion of astrology was complete, I did a five card yearly spread for her.  Amazingly the cards that came up mirrored all we had previously talked about.  We were both blown away.  Love this stuff.

Alone again, I needed a little meditation to ground myself.  After that, without much thought, I picked up The Wildwood Tarot deck and The Green Man appeared.  He has a good heart and his spirit warm.

As I read in the book "This is a time for both giving and receiving the natural flow of life both inwardly and outwardly.  Be prepared to find a new and thriving drive to begin projects, relationships and even new ways of living your life and fulfilling your world.  Now is the time to experience being at the apex of the cycle of life.  Enjoy it!"  

Yes indeed.  It is what I need to do.  Despite being so busy with work I need to find the time, even if only 15 minutes a day, to read the cards, or work with an astrology chart.  Make plans for the weekends to meet with anyone who will let me read for them.  Practice, practice, practice.  The more I do it, the more comfortable I will be and the easier the words will come.

How exciting!!