A sad, sad day yesterday.  My cousin's husband lost his battle with cancer.  Less than a year after being diagnosed.  There has already been so much loss in her life.  She lost her mother, her step-mother, her dad and now her husband.  No words, just no words.

I also found out yesterday my brother and his wife had to put down, Coal, their dog of 13 years.  Coal was family and he will be missed.

I also found out my good friend's, husband's best friend, had a heart attack and didn't make it.  

Almost too much put together with my dad's birthday and his passing on the 15th.  

After saying all that, today was a pretty good day.  Work was busy as usual but I wasn't stressed even though I had to stay a half an hour late.  When I got home I decided to play with my cards to try and unwind from the day before getting myself some food.

As I shuffled my thought was guidance please.  Actually my dilemma right now is trying to get myself back to a regular routine of exercise.  I seem to be stuck and can't do it.  The desire is there which is good but the motivation is lacking once home.  

A card fell out and I set it aside without looking at it and continued on.  Using the Lo Scarabeo Tarot deck pulled the Knight of Wands:

 My first thought was how intense it looks.  Not sure about the falling bodies.  Casualties of the hurriedness (I know that isn't a word LOL) perhaps or my three deaths (although one wasn't human).  He does seem in control and ready for a challenge.  He is facing left which to me is the past.  So my thoughts are to move forward but use what I have already gained from the past.  Most of my tools for success are from the past.  I just need to enhance on them and allow myself to use them.  Exercise was always a part of my routine.  It can be again.

Then I looked at the card that fell out:

Not a pretty card but the background isn't gloomy and is hopeful looking.  It is an appropriate card for my thoughts over these last few days.

There is no death! What seems so is a transition - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow ...